This summer has gone by so fast. It seems that every summer I go through, something significant happens, be it good or bad. But, regardless of that, I (most of the time) am really thanful for what happens. Like I have said before, life constantly seems someone changed. I still feel like I am being molded into the person I am going to inevitabley be. I'm ready for it though.
School is fast approaching, and with that, I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, I am so stoked to live in New North. What I'm most about is the fact that there will be an oven where I can cook my own food. Oh man, I am so excited to cook for me and my friends. It's gonna be splendid. Experementation here I come. When I think about it, I am most excited to meet new people. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends more than life itself, but its nice sometimes to get a break. I will most likely be down in Longmont all the time because now I have found a reason to come home, but it will be nice to be around people I haven't seen in a while. It will be nice to be in an unfamiliar place again.
Seeing as how I've changed my major, again, I have more interesting classes to look forward to. I think Psych is the one. I know that I've said that before about Art and Music, but I really do think Psych is what I wanna do. I love getting to know people and what makes them click, and I think that I would make a great counsellor. There are so many more practical applications to Psych than say Art. In the arts, you can be good and enjoy them (as I am), but when it really comes down to it, you have to EXCEPTIONAL if you plan to get anywhere. That I am not. Yes, I'm a competant singer, and yeah, I'm a better artist than most of the people I know, but that in itself doesn't make me extraoridinary. It's more of a hobby than a career for me.
These thoughts, and many others, make me excited to go back to Greeley...but there is also that which is holding me back.
I am back in my comfort zone. I am with my mom, and my best friends, and my new buddy, and that makes me content. I would be content to spend my last days with these people, and that gives me comfort, like a warm bed that you have slept in for years. Just like last year, I am feeling like my little world is kinda crashing down.
Lately, with the prospect that I'm leaving, I have been feeling like my life is in constant dischord. Nothing seems to feel right anymore. I'm not depressed, but I'm not entirely happy either. Uprooting just seems to shake things up for, but I guess that's what life is all about. It's about changing, and adapting. I guess I gotta learn that at some point.
The one things, though, that heartens me to no end, is that no matter where I go, who I meet, or what I do, I have five wonderful people here that will always be on my mind, and I on their's. It makes me smile that I have found comrades in this war called life. I know that with their support, I can do anything. My mom too. She is my conscience. I consult her on just about everything I do. I make sure that I am making her proud before I do something. That's how it's always been, and always will be.
I guess it's just sad to think that another summer has come and gone, and that every year that passes, I'm that much closer to growing up. That idea excites me, and kinda scares me too. I never thought I would be sitting here at the threshold of my SOPHOMORE year of college, in high school. I thought youth would be forever, and part of me wishes it was, but unfortunately, it's not.
So, in a week, my summer ends, and my professional life begins anew. I hope I'm ready for it.
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